A wise mentor once told me that I didn’t have to attend every fight I was invited to; that advice has proven to be useful in parenting and teaching alike — in fact, it’s helpful at work, in marriage, and pretty much in all aspects of life. Yet, I have to admit that few words can push my buttons like: “Why?…But why?…Why not?..You can’t make me!” – especially in the classroom.

To avoid engaging in power struggles, it’s helpful for me to remember that “When children are defiant, their goal is not to annoy, disrespect, or frustrate us. Rather, their goal often is to feel significant.” It’s also helpful to have lots of tools in my toolbox:

• 18 Ways to Avoid Power Struggles 
• “When Children are Defiant” – teacher tips from the Responsive Classroom
• Coping with Power Struggles – excellent handout for families

We’re interested in hearing from you,too. How do *you* prepare for those moments when the #struggleisreal?